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The Flashback Interview: Bruce Vilanch
By JOHNNY CAPS
AUGUST 10, 2021

I first came to know of Bruce Vilanch’s work in the 1990s. Whether it was through the jokes he wrote for Academy Awards hosts like Whoopi Goldberg and Billy Crystal, or through his deliciously saucy answers on the late-90s incarnation of Hollywood Squares, Mr. Vilanch made quite an impression on me. In 2021, with the assistance of Clay Mills of The Katz Company, I was able to set up an e-mail interview with Mr. Vilanch about various aspects of his work. Even in written format, his unique wit comes shining through, and I hope you all enjoy this interview.

Johnny: One of your very first television writing credits was for a variety show pilot for Charo. With Charo as a jumping-off point, when you’ve written jokes for international performers, have any of them had difficulty understanding your style and references, or are they able to pick up on it pretty quickly?

Bruce: Depends on how much English they have and how strong their dialect is, and if they are in the business of making fun of themselves, like Charo.  With her, the more ridiculous the better.  She loves doing jokes that feature her mangling her adopted tongue. In fact, give her that sentence and she will get a three-minute laugh and wind up showing the audience her tongue.  I didn’t write, it, but I was in a movie with Marcello Mastroianni many years ago.  He was extremely suave and pulled-together, and he spoke English, but he felt his accent made him sound like Chico Marx, or the guy on TV selling spicy meat-a-balls.  He didn’t want to be looked on as a clown, so he pretended he didn’t speak English.  On set, we would speak French to each other.  It was an Italian picture of the 70s, so we each learned the lines in whatever language we liked and spoke them that way, as it was all going to be dubbed later.  I think I was dubbed by Mercedes McCambridge.

Johnny: In addition to your work in creating jokes, you’re also an accomplished songwriter, and one of your credits as a songwriter was the title theme for the 1985 Stephen King adaptation Cat’s Eye. That movie was produced by Dino De Laurentiis, so as you have many stories about larger-than-life Hollywood personas, do you have any stories about Dino?

Bruce: Not about that picture, where I wrote the song with Jacques Morali (creator of The Village People), but when I was at the Chicago Tribune, I interviewed Dino at his palatial apartment on Central Park South, with the absolutely gorgeous Silvana Mangano floating in and out and their absolutely gorgeous children making a racket somewhere on the south forty. If I remember correctly, he was about to come to Chicago to shoot a mafia picture, and he wound up asking me more things than I asked him,  and the food was absolutely gorgeous.

Johnny: In 1987, you worked with The Walt Disney Company on two very different TV specials, Walt Disney World Celebrity Circus and Funny, You Don’t Look 200: A Constitutional Vaudeville. What was it like to be working with Disney in the time period when they were well into recovery from the failure of The Black Cauldron, yet still a long way from the top of the entertainment world?

Bruce: They didn’t talk much about The Black Cauldron.  I believe that was a holdover from the previous administration, the last one with a Disney relative in charge, before my people — the Jews! — took over.  At that point, I don’t think Michael Eisner and Jeffrey Katzenberg, both of whom I had worked with elsewhere, were much interested in Disney’s variety TV production.  The Constitution special was a passion project of Richard Dreyfuss, who was making some big comedies for them, and so they got behind it.  Also, it was a nice idea to try to educate an audience about the Constitution in a hopefully entertaining way. There were lots of names, but my favorite was Whoopi, with whom I got to work very closely and with whom I still work with very closely many x’s and o’s later.

The Celebrity Circus was more or less executed by the parks division, as it was a big plug for Walt Disney World.  We all flew to Orlando.  Tony Randall, far too erudite for this sort of carry-on, was the host and we had a fantastic time.  It was wonderful to watch him work surrounded by circus people and Disney characters, and see him cast a baleful eye at all of them.  He was determined to have one of the acts done to classical music, but I don’t think that happened.  On a private note, the Cosby kids were guests on the show, and I got to take a hot tub with Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet, and I fell in love with an elephant trainer, but that may be my YA novel.

Johnny: You’ve written for many Academy Awards ceremonies over the years. Although you’re well-known for your jokes on the Oscars, did you ever write any more serious segments for the show, and if so, which are you most proud of having written?

Bruce: Here’s the sick part.  I remember the jokes.  I don’t remember any of the serious stuff.  I know I did some.  There were always other writers who were not too funny, but very grown-up and elegant when they wrote about the various disciplines.  It’s difficult to come up with something meaningful about sound effects editing, but they did it.  These same writers generally blanched when I told them Martin Short and Carrie Fisher were going to present an award together, and their dialogue was going to be entirely about the fact that they were each wearing the same dress.

Johnny: When I watched the 93rd Academy Awards this year, I found it to be very dry and rather bereft of humor, and I really wish you had been involved in the show to give it a boost of fun. What would you have done differently if you were part of the Oscars writing staff for this year’s show?

Bruce: I would have bought a house for the comic personality who would agree to host the show.  I would have told the new producers that there is a good reason we always give one of the acting awards in the first half-hour.  People want to see stars and emotions.  They are not so interested in the origin stories of writers.  I would have moved the show around a little so it didn’t look like Stork Club night at the high school prom, with a curtain draped over the hoops and the bleachers arranged as nightclub tables.  Does anyone tune in to the Oscars to see a low-key intimate show?

When the highlights of the evening are Glenn Close doing Da Butt and Frances McDormand calling to her pack, I think it’s not unfair to say something is awry.  I actually think the Academy missed a good bet not shooting the whole thing at the new museum, which they are attempting to make a hot SoCal destination like Disneyland and Universal.  Clean it up and put it on worldwide TV.  They will come.

Johnny: Jumping back to the 90s, you were a regular for several years on the late 90s/early 00s revival of Hollywood Squares. What joke, or jokes, would you say were the funniest you had written for that show during your time on it?

Bruce: I know a few jokes I loved.  One of the biggest laughs I got was when Tom Bergeron asked me which television show boldly goes where no man has gone before.  I said: Ellen.  I also mentioned that Woody Allen and Soon-Yi Previn were going around New York camouflaged as Maury Povich and Connie Chung.  At the time, it was a big laugh.

Johnny: Going forward into the 00s, you did a season of the VH1 Celebreality series Celebrity Fit Club. I’ve asked this question of several reality TV veterans, including Rocky DeMarco and Jeana Keough, and I’d like to ask it of you as well: How much reality would you say is in reality television?

Bruce: The first rule of reality TV is nothing is real.  They have an arc worked out for each person, and they guide you into giving them what they want by having a little meeting with you each week and telling you things to make you mad or upset at a specific person.  Since we were all professionals on that show — it was not The Biggest Loser — we figured out how to give it to them without making fools of ourselves.  They want you to lose it.  It’s good TV.  If you don’t play along, they edit you out or they make you look like a crazy person.  Paddy Chayefsky lives!

Johnny: Platinum, the 1979 Broadway musical you co-wrote the book for, was revived in 2010 by UnsungMusicalsCo. Inc. Were you involved in the revival, and if not, would you have been interested in doing so?

Bruce: I was marginally involved.  Ben West had written a new version of the show, not all that different, and we gave him the right to do that.  My principal worry after Platinum flopped was that I would have to sit under the poster on Joe Allen’s wall for the rest of my life.  I told Joe and he asked how long we ran.  I told him, 33 performances.  He said, “Are you kidding?  You were a smash.  You have to close opening night to get on this wall,  or better, in New Haven!”

Johnny: You’re well-known for wearing humorous T-shirts of various kinds. What’s the origin behind that style, and what shirt would you say is your favorite?

Bruce: I was a portly child with a perfectionist mother who always made me dress a certain way, and I have been in rebellion my entire life.  T-shirts were the perfect out, especially when I moved to LA and discovered you can go almost anywhere wearing one.  My favorite is, undoubtedly, in a very serious font:  Excuse me, you’re standing on my penis.

Johnny: Although we’re slowly making our way back to normalcy, COVID-19 has made an indelible impact on all of us. How has coronavirus impacted your life and work, and how do you hope people will have changed once the saga draws to a close?

Bruce: It’s been a year without pants.  I’m a writer, so I got to sit at the keyboard and pound it out.  Wait, that came out wrong.  I got to write and Zoom, and if I didn’t forget myself and stand up and do a Jeffrey Toobin, I was alright.  Live performing disappeared, so I did a lot of podcasts to exercise that muscle.  I also wrote a musical about a guy in quarantine,  but I can’t talk about it yet.

As for how people have changed once the saga draws to a close…I’m hoping for a comeback for French kissing.  Listen, so much happened between BLM and #metoo and the fall of Orange Julius Caesar. Let’s just hope we have a recognizable planet to inhabit as kinder, gentler people. except for Jake Paul and Lea DeLaria, who should have a YouTube fight that he will never win.

The post Looking Back With Bruce Vilanch first appeared on We Got Bruce!.

Wigs & Wishes provides professional wigs & grants wishes for women & children battling cancer…

Wigs & Wishes will present “One Night with the Stars” on December 4, 2017 in New York City at Madison Square Garden. The Garden Theater holds 5700 seats.

Ticket prices range from $66 to $1006 for VIP seating that includes celebrity meet and greet, swag bag and seating in the first three rows. Tickets can be purchased HERE.

The all-star Broadway, TV, pop and film star line-up for “One Night with the Stars” includes performances by Jordin Sparks, Betty Buckley, Natasha Bedingfield, Sofia Carson, Noah Galvin, Mandy Gonzalez, Sal Valentinetti, James Maslow, Lillias White, Lainie Kazan, Anthony Rapp, Jon Jon Briones, Jenn Gambatese, Sharon Catherine Brown, Telly Leung, Tom Bergeron, Bruce Vilanch, and a Special All Star Performance created by Nappytabs.

“One Night with the Stars” is directed by Billy Blanks Jr. who has been the performance director at the newly renovated Wall Street Theater in Norwalk, CT for the past year.

Below, check out a short video about Wigs & Wishes!

Famed hairstylist, Martino Cartier is the founder of the non-profit Wigs & Wishes charity providing high end wigs and granting once in a lifetime wishes for children battling cancer. Inspired by his dear friend’s brave battle and triumph over cancer, Martino Cartier set out to create a network of fellow salon owners, stylists and beauty industry experts united in their mission to ease the stress and pain felt by women battling cancer and suffering from hair loss as well as granting wishes to children. Some of the recent wishes granted include a day playing basketball with legendary player Shaquille O’Neal and a personal facetime conversation with Taylor Swift. Visit www.martinocartier.com for more information.

Celebrity Stylist, Martino Cartier, is a successful salon owner with a staff of over 50. He has been featured on Bravo TV, Modern Salon Magazine, Vogue, Launchpad, Behind the Chair, Salon Today, and The Golden Globes. Before creating his own brand, Martino By Martino Cartier, he was the International Artistic Director for Keratin Complex and the Global Artistic Director for Hotheads. Martino and his team have been featured at all of the major hair shows in North America including Waldorf Astoria Intercoiffure and Fontainebleau Intercoiffure. Martino has been featured along with Tabatha Coffey, Kim Vo, Ken Paves, John Frieda and many more at the Stylist Choice Awards.

Jordin Sparks, Betty Buckley and More to Headline ONE NIGHT WITH THE STARS for Wigs & WishesSelf-taught and working professionally from his youth, Billy Blanks Jr. gained much exposure and experience in the world of dance and entertainment as a young teen who choreographed school musical productions and created after school dance groups. He has been featured in music videos with Paula Abdul, Madonna, Crystal Method, Quincy Jones, and Babyface. His TV credits include: American Dreams, The Practice, Sister Sister, Kids Incorporated, Homeboys From Outer Space, My Cousin Skeeter, and The Tonight Show. He starred in the touring company Fame and went on to direct and choreograph the We Sparkle Take II Celebrity Concert with Tom Hanks, Jason Alexander, Brian Cranston, Joey Lawrence, Britney Spears, Michael Chiklis, Hal Sparks, and the cast of Will & Grace. He launched the MoveTube network at www.youtube.com/channel/UCv1ooht_32QrbfsfeikldjQ and is currently producer and director at the Wall Street Theater in CT. Billy Blanks Jr. is the creator of Dance It Out® (DIO®) one of the most successful dance fitness programs worldwide. He is the son of Tae Bo® creator Billy Blanks.

The post Bruce Vilanch, Betty Buckley and More to Headline ONE NIGHT WITH THE STARS for Wigs & Wishes first appeared on We Got Bruce!.

A rush ticket policy has been announced for the 2017 Cabaret Convention, which will feature more than 60 performers. Presented by The Mabel Mercer Foundation, the celebration of New York nightlife will take place October 16-19 at the Frederick P. Rose Hall, Jazz at Lincoln Center.

In a statement, Artistic Director KT Sullivan said, “The Mabel Mercer Foundation sees this offer as an extension of our charter, by which we might provide students—and other performers and musicians—an affordable opportunity to enjoy the great popular songbook, both traditional and present-day. Mabel Mercer herself reveled in singing both the old and the new across her entire 70-year career; she never stopped adding contemporary material to her presentations.”

The gala opening will be followed by evenings that pay tribute to George Gershwin; Hoagy Carmichael, and Richard Whiting as well as the “golden age” of Manhattan’s supper clubs, boites, bistros, and piano bars. Show time each night is 6 PM.

The current lineup follows:

October 16: Gala Opening Night, hosted by KT Sullivan. With Corinna Sowers Adler, Danny Bacher, Carole J. Bufford, Joshua Lance Dixon, Tommy J. Dose, Greg Gropper, Luba Mason, Marilyn Maye, Tanya Moberly, Karen Oberlin, Lyric Peterson, Vivian Reed, Adam Shapiro, Jacob Storms. Presentation of The Donald F. Smith Award, underwritten by Adela and Larry Elow. Presentation of The Mabel Mercer Award to Vivian Reed.

October 17: S’Wonderful: The Music of George Gershwin, hosted by Jeff Harnar and Andrea Marcovicci. With Karen Akers, Anna Bergman, Celia Berk, Eric Comstock, Barbara Fasano, Shauna Hicks, Nicolas King, Stearns Matthews, Marissa Mulder, Mark Nadler, T. Oliver Reid, Steve Ross, Jennifer Sheehan, Deborah Silver, Gabrielle Stravelli, Jon Weber, Aaron Weinstein.

October 18: Intimate Nights: The Golden Age of Cabaret, hosted by James Gavin. With Barbara Brussell, Charles Busch, Charles Cochran, Natalie Douglas, Laura Kenyon, Carol Lipnik, Maude Maggart, Nellie McKay, Sidney Myer, Molly Pope, Ricky Ritzel, Spider Saloff, Bruce Vilanch, Ronny Whyte. (This evening is dedicated to Barbara Carroll, “The First Lady of the American Keyboard.”)

October 19: Too Marvelous for Words/Stardust: The Music of Hoagy Carmichael & Richard Whiting, hosted by Klea Blackhurst. With Matt Baker, Joie Bianco, Shana Farr, Liam Forde, Eric Yves Garcia, Gregory Generet, Valerie Lemon, Kristoffer Lowe, Tammy McCann, Todd Murray, Josephine Sanges, Billy Stritch, Stacy Sullivan, Carol Woods, Amra-Faye Wright. Presentation of The Margaret Whiting Award, underwritten by My Ideal Music. Presentation of The Julie Wilson Award, underwritten by Linda and Peter Hanson.

Jazz at Lincoln Center’s Frederick P. Rose Hall is located at Broadway and 60th Street. Prices are $100, $50, and $25, and Premium Patron Seating is also available at $500 ($350 of which is tax-deductible). Tickets are for sale through Jazz at Lincoln Center by visiting JALC.org or their box office.

The post Bruce Vilanch Will Be Performing Oct 18 At The Cabaret Convention At The Frederick P. Rose Hall, Jazz At Lincoln Center. first appeared on We Got Bruce!.

Join Boulder Jewish Family Service (JFS) for the fifth annual Reel Hope Boulder featuring award-winning writer, comedian, songwriter, and actor Bruce Vilanch on Saturday, October 14 at 7:00 pm at the Boulder JCC, 6007 Oreg Avenue. This fundraising event will include a wine and beer reception with substantial hors d’oeuvres and a first-hand account of Bruce’s storied decades-long career. Sponsors will enjoy an exclusive reception with Bruce at 6:30 pm.

All proceeds support the life-transforming work of Boulder JFS, which provides older adults, adults with disabilities, their families, and individuals in crisis with services to enhance their quality of life.

About Bruce Vilanch

With his unmistakable presence—characterized by a big-girl figure, oversized red glasses, a shaggy blonde mane, and usually a hilarious T-shirt—Bruce Vilanch has been one of Hollywood’s most colorful characters for decades. His campy presence and outrageous apparel only heighten his broad appeal.

He’s known to many as an onscreen character actor and comedian, but Vilanch achieved his biggest successes as a writer for stand-up comics such as Bette Midler, Billy Crystal, Lily Tomlin, and Rosanne Barr. For many years, he was the go-to comic for stand-up sets and a first-choice writer for events, including the Oscar, Grammy, Emmy, and Tony telecasts.

For more information about sponsorship opportunities and tickets, please contact Bonni Raderman, Boulder JFS development associate, at 720.749.3404 or braderman@jewishfamilyservice.org. Tickets will go on sale in September.

The post Save the Date for Reel Hope Boulder Featuring Bruce Vilanch first appeared on We Got Bruce!.

Last night, a “who’s who” of New York City gathered to honor Michael Musto at a roast given in his honor. No, really, who was who?

Comedian Bruce Vilanch was the fabulous emcee for the evening. Rosie O’Donnell opened the show with a few words, roasting Musto by reminding the audience of how their relationship began many years ago.
“I know it wasn’t really a shock to anyone in this room that I was a big fucking lesbian but middle America apparently was confused,” O’Donnell said. “And Michael Musto was a very pissed off fag.”

“Very faggy gay men seem to be very troubled by dykey gay women who refuse to acknowledge their lesbianism,” she went on.

But obviously the water is under the bridge, as O’Donnell showed up to support Musto’s event for a good cause. O’Donnell ended her set by matching funds raised for the Callen-Lorde Center, donating $20,000 to the LGBT wellness center in New York City.

Jinkx Monsoon, Bianca Del Rio, Real Housewife LuAnn D’Agostino and Judy Gold were just some of the notable names on the bill, reading each other and the man of the hour. Del Rio of course was a highlight of the night — and right at home up there, as roasting is what she does best.

The evening was produced by Daniel DeMello and Nathaniel Nowak. Directed by Rachel Klein, many of the night’s best jokes were written for the roasters by Erik Ransom and Matthew McLachlan. Even Musto himself wrote some of the best digs made at his own expense.

Here are 14 of the funniest moments from Michael Musto’s roast:
Bruce Vilanch to United Airways:

“I came in from LA for this. It was incredible this morning as they dragged me off my United flight. Which was really unusual because I thought United only does Chinese take-out.”

Michael Musto to Bianca Del Rio:

“Bianca Del Rio, Hurricane Katrina is only the second worst thing to ever happen to New Orleans.”

Bianca Del Rio to Randy Rainbow:

“I don’t really know who Randy Rainbow is, but from the looks of his name, I guarantee he’s not allowed 800 feet anywhere near a grade school.”

Judy Gold to Michael Musto:

“Michael Musto is Al Franken run over by a pride parade.”

Johnny Skandros to Countess LuAnn:

“You’re the worst thing to happen to music since Whitney Houston started taking baths.”

Bianca Del Rio to Rosie O’Donnell:

“She has her differences with Trump. But she is a lot like Trump. She has five different kids from three different wives. It’s funny, because if Rosie goes ahead and buys another child, she will have to live in a shoe. And with her being a lesbian, can you imagine how fucking ugly that shoe is going to be?”

Johnny Skandros to Michael Musto

“I have to give you a lot of credit, Musto. You somehow survived the ’80s. It’s like your face was the original PrEP.”

Jinkx Monsoon to Michael Musto:

“With all the fashion sense of a hospital out-patient, Michael Musto looks like Ray Romano if he had a much harder life.”

Orfeh to Bruce Vilanch:

“These are scary times, folks. I don’t understand how people can continue to deny climate change in 2017. I mean, the proof is right in front of us! It’s almost summer and Bruce Vilanch’s neck pouch is still stuffed with the acorns he foraged last fall!”

Crystal Demure to Bianca Del Rio:

“Other recommended viewings on Netflix for Hurricane Bianca are ‘Gouging Their Eyes Out.’”

Marcus Kelle to Bruce Vilanch:

“The last time you got fucked was by genetics.”

Judy Gold to Jinkx Monsoon:

“You look like Kathy Griffin had sex with meth!”

Lucy The Slut to the drag queens:

“Look at these drag queens! They look great, but their makeup is kinda like Febreeze. Pleasant, but it’s main purpose is to cover up shit.”

Michael Musto to Jinkx Monsoon:

“Jinx, you do a brilliant Edie Beale impression, except she happened to be talented, not just mentally ill.”

The post Bruce Vilanch Emcees The Michael Musto Roast first appeared on We Got Bruce!.